Guest Writer #74: “Are You Being Led On?” by Bianca

Here is another blog by Bianca, one of our new guest writers. We hope you enjoy reading it…

One of the pitfalls of modern dating, especially internet dating, is being led on by someone who isn’t that into you. It’s so easy to send someone an email or an instant message, yet so hard to get across the nuances of meaning in a bit of text on a screen. Getting a reply from someone doesn’t mean they really like you, and sometimes people can come across as friendly when they’re just being polite.

It’s quite common when using a dating site to email someone back and forth, and then not hear from them for days or even weeks. What should you do if that happens?

The obvious answer is to just ask. Maybe your message got lost somehow, or your love interest forgot to reply. Maybe they’ve been on holiday or haven’t logged onto the dating site in a while. If you drop them a line to ask if they got your message, someone that likes you back would respond. If you don’t hear back then that’s no loss – there are plenty more fish in the sea.

People go into online dating for lots of different reasons, but a large number have had a breakup at some point in the past. It’s really common in this case for people to want to take things slowly, so if someone backs off they might just be trying to slow things down. If you’re the kind of person to tell someone how you feel, you might be inadvertently scaring them off. Instead of trying to whisk them away on a romantic weekend, suggest a casual date or even a get-together with friends so that there’s no pressure. That way you can get to know each other without any expectations.

If you really like someone, it’s worth waiting for them to give them a chance, even if they don’t reply straight away to your messages, or they don’t seem overly keen. Of course, you shouldn’t stop looking around. You never know when you might find someone who’s really into you, so keep your options open!

This is a guest post by Bianca from Parship,

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