Nightmare Date #31: Helen’s nightmare that just wouldn’t go away….

We have all had them. The dates that leave you swirling and twirling as the door closes. You find yourself jumping up and down with giddiness and excitement and wanting to call your best friends to dish about how wonderful your date was. This folks, was not one of them.

Steve was a man whom I had met through a friend. He seemed like a great guy after our first date. I had the type of date that was described above, in fact. I came home twirling and swirling and giddy with excitement in imagining the possibilities with this man. Two weeks passed and we made another date for a Friday night.

That day, however, everything that could have gone wrong, did. I called to warn Steve that I was running late and we would need to bump our date back an hour or two. Before this time, he had seemed like a calm, rationale man. I knew him to be passionate man when he spoke of things that were important to him. I later learned, however, that passion can be a bad thing, too.

As a teacher, I always tell my students that even the best attribute in a person, if taken a notch too far can quickly turn into a bad thing. This is what happened with Steve. His passion quickly flipped to anger when I told him that I was going to have to bump our date back. Not only was he unhappy, he went on and on about how I wasn’t giving him enough time in my life and how selfish I was. For about an hour, we went back and forth arguing (and I NEVER argue with anyone. I believe things can be rationally talked out). However, Steve was being irrational, and I just couldn’t get it through to him that this was a one time thing.

Turn the hands of the clock  ahead two hours and many phone calls and hang ups later, and I was getting my tired body ready for a date that Steve insisted he want to keep. This was a chore, because the day had taken an emotional and physical toll on my body. However, to prove to him that I was going the distance, I got “gussied up” and put on my makeup, curled my hair and  put on the nicest sundress and heels that I could find.

The moment I answered the door, Steve’s face fell. He looked at me, pushed past me and said, “We need to talk”. Aghast, (I was self consciously thinking that he wasn’t happy with how I looked) I followed him into my living room. There, we sat as he began fervently talking about how upset I had made him that day. He went on and on for 30 minutes without letting me get a word in edge wise. Each time I tried to speak, he would tear apart my sentence (because that is all I could muster out besides a few squeaks here and there) and would continue to rant on about how he wasn’t getting enough of my time. Finally, after forty five minutes had passed and his passionate rant had no end in sight, I simply said, “Get out.”

“What?” Was all he could say as the rant stopped for a mere second and his look of confusion almost made me laugh. However, after about five seconds, he shook his head and continued on his rant.

“I said, get the hell out of my apartment! I can’t get in a word edge wise and you expect me to sit here, all dressed up and just take this all night. You are talking in circles and I…” I began, but of course was cut off…

“Helen…you don’t get it, do you? I am demanding more of your time..and I will get it!”

“Seriously, Steve. I don’t stutter. Get the hell out of my apartment right now. And, did you say, “demand more of my time?” I laughed as I stood up and began walking to the door.However, he audaciously continued to sit on my couch and continue his rant. Finally, I said, “Get the hell out. I don’t want to see you anymore, this conversation is over! Actually, it is a rant, because a conversation consists of two sides being told…and clearly, you won’t let me tell mine. So, get out.”

“What?” He said as he looked at my with a confused stare and finally stood up off of my couch. “What are you going to do?”

“I don’t know Steve, but I sure as hell am not staying here! So, get the hell out of my place now or I will call security.” I said as I began walking out the door and put my key in the lock. Thankfully, he couldn’t smell the fear I am sure I was exuding because he is much bigger in stature than I am. He could have easily done something other than walk out of my place. As he walked me to my car, he continued on with his story.

“Goodbye. That’s all I have to say, Steve.” I said, cutting him off. “Please, erase my number and forget where I live because it’s over.”

With that, I drove off as he got into his car. Within seconds, I was on the phone with my dear Gigi, asking her to go out.  That night, I had to go somewhere, anywhere else besides there. Gigi and I ended up dancing the night away and having a blast, despite the start of the day. OH, thank God for friends! As for my nightmare dates, all I have to say is that they give me the sweet perspective to appreciate a good date when I have one. I am long overdue for one at this point, but in due time. In due time. 🙂

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